All children develop differently and their temperaments are not the same. It is important to understand that what may work for one child may not necessarily work for another. Throughout the decades experts have created ways to effectively discipline. Trying different methods help parents discover which techniques are most effective.
Parents oftentimes use punishment as a form of discipline, not knowing that there is a difference between the two. Before proper disciplining can take place, parents’ first need to understand what discipline is and its purpose. Discipline can be understood as the reaction parents have towards bad behavior. The purpose behind the reaction is to teach children:
- Self-control
- Difference between right and wrong
- How to respect others
- Appropriate versus inappropriate behavior
This article is to help parents find effective ways to help promote positive behavior.
Parents Behavior Can Affect the Outcome
Raising children would be easier if children came with a step-by-step how-to guide on how to successfully handle bad behavior. The unfortunate reality is there is no way to tell how children are going to behave and which method of discipline is best to use.
Parents however, can determine their own behavior to help diffuse a bad situation. Staying in control can always lead to positive disciplining. Although easier said than done, working out problems calmly and patiently will produce more positive results rather than becoming angry or frustrated. Children mimic adult behavior. If parents tantrum when upset, children will do the same.
Tone of voice plays a major role during discipline. Parents need to use a firm controlled voice when wanting to discuss issues that matter. Giving in or showing trepidation when children are arguing or having temper tantrums can results in repeated bad behavior. When parents are firm and consistent it shows that what they are saying is what they mean and children will begin to realize that they are not going to win and will stop.
Effect Discipline Methods
Young children are learning what behaviors are appropriate and what is not through discipline. Their natural curiosity oftentimes leads them into an activity that results in trouble. When parents see children involved in a situation that is unacceptable, an effective technique is to redirect or divert their attention to a more desirable activity. It is important to explain to children why their actions are being stopped. It helps them avoid that particular behavior in the future.
Redirection also gives children a chance to utilize their own problem solving skills. For example, if children are writing on walls, encourage them to come up with better ways to use crayons. When children are encouraged to solve the problem on their own, it helps enhance their ability to distinguish between right and wrong, possibly preventing future occurrences.
When children are behaving in a manner that is unacceptable, parents can use time-outs as an effective way to discipline. The purpose for using this method is to remove children from the negative situation. By doing this it gives them an opportunity to calm down and allow them to reflect on their misbehavior. Parents need to be sure to explain to children the reason for the removal. It is important for children to understand why the choices they made were not appropriate. Once the child has had an opportunity to relax, parents should then encourage a more positive activity.
Some misbehavior is done as way to get attention. Acknowledging this type of behavior can lead to future problems. Ignoring children when they are attempting to illicit reactions through bad behavior is the best thing parents can do. Children need attention for good behavior, not for misbehavior.
Sometimes using tangible objects can help children understand what behavior is appropriate. Getting children involved with disciplining helps hold them accountable for their own actions. Some examples of these items are:
- Behavioral charts
- Sticker charts
- Marble jar
Finding the best techniques to discipline children takes time. Parents should not get discourage if they find that certain techniques do not work. It requires a lot of trial an error to discover what works most effectively.